If you’re at the beginning of your divorce process, you may be considering representing yourself instead of hiring a lawyer, thinking you’ll save time and money by doing so. If your marriage was very short, if both of you are committed to ending your marriage without a legal or financial battle, if you have no children or assets, and if neither of you wants or needs to receive spousal support (alimony) from the other, then you may be able to process your own divorce using a kit or online tools.
However, most people find divorce to be a complicated and confusing process, and they’re grateful to have an experienced family lawyer to help guide them through it. You’ll need to make a lot of decisions that will affect the rest of your life – at a time when emotions may overwhelm your ability to think clearly. So although not everyone needs a divorce lawyer, obtaining a good one is often in your best interests – especially if your divorce is complicated, contested, involves children, you have significant assets, or if your soon-to-be ex-spouse has hired a divorce lawyer.
Here are five reasons to consider hiring a divorce lawyer rather than representing yourself in court.
1. You are unfamiliar with matrimonial law and/or family court
In court, self-represented litigants are not given any special treatment; judges hold them to the same standards as the lawyer for the other side. Most judges are fairly patient people, but if you don’t know the law – or what documents you need, or even what to do next – you may be pushing the judge’s patience past the breaking point. The more annoyed a judge is, the less sympathetic he/she is likely to be. Family lawyers are experts in knowing what to say to make their case seem more reasonable than yours. Lawyers who focus on areas outside family law hire a family lawyer when they’re getting a divorce; they recognize that they’ll be out of their depth when faced with a lawyer who practices family law exclusively. So it’s extremely unlikely that you’ll be able to adequately prepare to face the court process – and your spouse’s lawyer – by yourself. To make matters worse, you can jeopardize your entire case by saying or doing just one thing wrong.
2. You need objective advice at this emotional time
Divorce is an extremely emotional time for both spouses. You may experience feelings of sadness, betrayal, fear, depression, rage, confusion, and resignation – sometimes all on the same day! This level of heightened emotions, and the fact that you cannot possibly be objective about your case, will skew your judgement. Very few people have had the time or the willingness to work through their emotions about their soon-to-be ex-spouse during the divorce process, which will hinder their ability to work productively with the other side to resolve important matters. If you’re thinking of representing yourself, you need to be aware that your emotional state may prevent you from making wise decisions about the future.…